BREAKING: The Democratic Party Releases New Lib-aru Car
A Green New Wheel, so to speak.
10 Things to Do Instead of Grad School, Because the Scariest Thing Is Your Future
Happy Halloween! Goblins, ghouls, graduate studies. Are you scared? Here are some safer, more palatable alternatives. You don’t need an MFA to write riddles that...
Everybody Poops, But Do They All Use It To Write Sonnets On the Communal Bathroom Wall? One Poet Speaks Out.
"I am starting a movement. Of the bowel.”
Senior Dies of Too Much Nostalgia
If you thought the intermingling of covid, the flu, mono, freshman dorm chlamydia, and all the other miscellaneous diseases circulating through the campus atmosphere was...
Venmo Requesting Your Male Friends for $0.16 and Other Ways to Celebrate Women’s History Month
What’s not to love about March? There are the first signs of Spring, Pisces season, and — most importantly — Women’s History Month! As a...
BREAKING: Gala a shocking follow-up to Willy Wonka experience
Did the huge, unfilled warehouse vibe of the Rhode Island convention center feel familiar? Well, it may be because similar images have been flooding your...
Tragic! You Just Got Andrews on Ivy Room Tomato Soup Night
Imagine this: It is a frigid, wet Providence evening and you are absolutely famished from your singular class of the day and two-hour-long “study session”...
How to Communicate that You’re Gay When You Don’t Know How to Dress
Let an unfashionable, straight-looking lesbian tell YOU how to wear your sexuality on your sleeve (but, like, without actually wearing anything of substance).
Student Whose Phone Went off in “Absolute Quiet Room” Escorted Away by Men in Suits, Now Missing for 7 Days
Last Tuesday, freshman Ann Oing went missing. She was last spotted in the “Absolute Quiet Room” of the John D. Rockefeller library. Witnesses to the...
How to Stay Fed Off Meal Plan
After 3 years of being coddled like a helpless infant, coming off meal plan is truly such a rude awakening. But have no fear! Here...