Worst Person in the World Orders a Double Espresso Shot Latte with Caramel, Vanilla, Mocha, Low Sugar and 70% Ice in the Blue Room
Can she have that in her personal mug, to-go? And don't overdo it on the ice.
Senior Dies of Too Much Nostalgia
If you thought the intermingling of covid, the flu, mono, freshman dorm chlamydia, and all the other miscellaneous diseases circulating through the campus atmosphere was...
BREAKING: Gala a shocking follow-up to Willy Wonka experience
Did the huge, unfilled warehouse vibe of the Rhode Island convention center feel familiar? Well, it may be because similar images have been flooding your...
Brown U Nurse Suggests Potion Made of “Draught of Elderberrie,”a “Prettie Quantitie of Lobſter Shell” and a “Unicorne’s Horne, if Thou Cans’t Find it”
A handy recipe for your back to school flu.
5 Must-Haves for University Presidents This Holiday Season
A handy gift guide for these PR-atrocities personified.
How to Communicate that You’re Gay When You Don’t Know How to Dress
Let an unfashionable, straight-looking lesbian tell YOU how to wear your sexuality on your sleeve (but, like, without actually wearing anything of substance).
Back off Ladies, That was MY Boyfriend in the Inflatable Garfield Suit
I know you all wanted a piece of that fine, orange ass. I heard your whistles when he walked by, your rawrs. I felt your...
My Suggestions for Throwing a Truly TERRIFYING Halloween Party
The Rib's official list of bone-chilling Halloweekend party themes! Featuring DIY escape rooms and Hamilton.
“Let’s Meet in the Perelman Arts District!” And Other Useful Phrases for Getting Out of Plans
The Perelman Arts District is an extremely vaguely defined region, making it the perfect place to schedule a meet-up with your least favourite friend –...
Student Whose Phone Went off in “Absolute Quiet Room” Escorted Away by Men in Suits, Now Missing for 7 Days
Last Tuesday, freshman Ann Oing went missing. She was last spotted in the “Absolute Quiet Room” of the John D. Rockefeller library. Witnesses to the...