Everyone has heard of a sexual awakening. It can take many forms, but essentially, you see, hear, smell, or touch something, and it produces a not entirely anticipated sexual response. It’s the first time your mind wandered to someone, and instead of thinking of that person platonically, something clicked deep inside your body, making you both uncomfortable, and aroused.
Some would define a sexual awakening as a one-time thing, but your libido is complicated. I think that these experiences happen all of the time, in different regards and circumstances. For example, there’s a difference between the first time you saw Michael Fassbender on the silver screen, and thought, “damn, that’s a jawline”, versus discovering you really enjoy a certain position in the bedroom. However, both experiences are awakenings, and they are both sexual.
Feeling something new in your loins is an empowering thing, but it can also be distracting. If I had my first sexual awakening in high school, college feels like I’m wearing ten caffeine patches on each arm. Eroticism is awesome, but I have homework sort of!
This is why I am excited to announce: my body is moving into retrograde. I am, in fact, experiencing a sexual falling asleep.
I don’t know why, but Monday morning, I awoke to find myself no longer thirsty. Maybe it was because I hit rock bottom at Lupo’s on Friday night, or maybe it was overhearing the very loud sex that my neighbors had after the Superbowl. (I hope it was angry sex over that final interception in the endzone). Whether it be an act of God, or a hormonal response to all of this snow (which may also be linked to an act of God), I’m not complaining.
Obviously, I do not want to stay in coital hibernation forever, but I welcome the change of pace. There are so many new opportunities. I can do things like go to the gym, eat a Chipotle Burrito, and build a snowman, all without being plagued with question: when next will I get laid? It’s probably abnormal to be a 20 year-old woman with a declining sex drive, but for now, I’m just going to see where this takes me.
Here’s to not having my mind in the gutter, for once!
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