10 Costumes So Politically Correct, Even Your Wokest Friends Will Be Impressed
Every year, white people never cease to amaze me with the offensiveness of their Halloween costumes. Like seriously, who raised you? Just remember: no dressing...
God is a Woman: Creep from High School Now Bald
Checkmate, atheists!
My Advice For Neurotypicals Struck By the Adderall Shortage
please, sir, may I have some more?
Everybody Poops, But Do They All Use It To Write Sonnets On the Communal Bathroom Wall? One Poet Speaks Out.
"I am starting a movement. Of the bowel.”
Athlete Wearing 8 Against Hate Shirt Definitely Says the R-Word
The pieces just write themselves I swear.
The Underground’s New Spooky Menu Features Warm Milk and Cobweb Latte
It turns out the recent BDH article about the Underground’s 10 health code violations was actually just a teaser for their new Halloween menu! The Warm Milk and...
Help! I Just Turned 20 and Now I Really Want to Step on the Pembroke Seal
We're all getting intense baby fever right now, right?
Main Green Skateboarders Skate Over CPax’s Foot, SAO Issues ‘StandUp to Skating’ Module
“I didn’t understand before, but I do now: this is discrimination, and I won’t stand for it."
Bad Luck Babe! On Turning 13 on Friday the 13th
Shoutout to Taylor Swift for making 13 cool again, and fuck you Taylor Swift for making everyone think I am copying you!