You’ve probably heard of the “tampon tax,” or the sales tax placed on menstrual products. This taxation can make obtaining vital menstrual products unnecessarily difficult and appears sexist, or at best unjust, considering that other items classified as medical devices (i.e. bandages) are tax exempt. But… maybe… just maybe… we want this tax???
Recently a Tennessee senator argued against including menstrual products in the state’s yearly sales tax free weekend. He argued that doing so would lead women to purchase these products at insane rates and even hoard them. Oddly, he was unconcerned that individuals would hoard other items already included in the weekend, but perhaps that’s beyond the point. Could he be on to something here? Are tax-free tampons the first step in a cascading sequence of suffering? We can’t say no for sure.
There’re really only two outcomes if menstrual products are made tax exempt: 1) life goes on as normal and individuals have greater access to necessary products; or 2) absolute menstrual anarchy erupts due to a tampon/pad monopoly. The latter… is a truly scary and highly probable outcome. If these products are made tax exempt for a weekend, obviously some conniving group will swoop in and buy up every single last tampon and pad. Those not a part of that group will be left tampon- and pad-less. They’ll be forced to wear diapers while on their periods. And have you ever heard of a no-show diaper? Yeah, I didn’t think so. These folks are gonna be stuck with huuuuuuuuge panty lines. These poor souls will have to spend 25% of their lives in diapers, all because of one tax-free weekend. It’s atrocious. They will have to sit out any water related activity: no pool party, no swimming in the lake, no jumping through waves, none of it. And sports? Yeah right. If you’ve seen any tampon commercial you know it’s only possible to remain athletically competent on your period if you use tampons. Diapers aren’t gonna cut it. These diaper dependents will certainly not be happy with their situation. Those not wearing diapers will be assumed to be members of the aforementioned ‘conniving group’ and will be both ostracized and often attacked by diaper wearers. To avoid being targeted, eventually everyone will start wearing diapers all the time. Tragic.
Clearly, the ramifications of including menstrual products in a tax-free weekend would be enormous. And, given just how likely this scenario is, tampon users unfortunately must keep paying this tax. It’s the only thing keeping us safe from diaper filled drudgery.