See, most guys want a skinny blond girl with rich parents, designer clothes, flawless makeup, and the normal amount of bones in her head.
Girls who don’t fit the mould on the other hand, have little-to-no chance. Take me for example. I have shorter brown hair, a love for pizza and French fries, and a palpable, bony mass approximately 3cm X 3cm in size protruding from the skull base. What kind of guy is going to pick me over the living Barbie doll?
If boys just gave girls like me a chance, however, they would realize that we actually have a lot to offer. When you think of it, doesn’t cuddling and some Netflix sound like way more fun than a trip to the mall? Doesn’t dating a girl who only needs 15 minutes to get ready sound a lot better than a girl who needs two hours to do a perfect contour? Doesn’t the opportunity to date someone with an osteochondroma – a bone tumor that effects one out of every 200,000 people and almost never occurs in the head — sound a lot more fun than a basic rich girl whose never even had a CAT scan? You tell me, boys!
So yeah, I’d rather watch Game of Thrones than The Bachelor; and; yeah, I’d rather hang out with some down-to-earth guys than some gossipy cheerleaders; and yeah, my head is technically not symmetrical. So what? That’s what makes me real. I don’t believe in fixing all of my imperfections with makeup and Botox and “surgery to extricate the bone lesion”. I think that everyone is fine just as they are.
And unlike other girls, I won’t try to change you or make you into somebody that you’re not. Dating is hard enough without trying to pretend that you’re another person! So I won’t force you to put down your video games; in fact, I’ll pick up a controller. I won’t pressure you into a kale and avocado water diet; I’d rather that we share a giant roll of cookie dough while watching Blade Runner. And I won’t drag you to Urban Outfitters or Pac Sun to go buy the latest fashions; if I’m dragging you anywhere, it’ll only be to my next appointment to determine whether or not I need “surgery to extricate the bone lesion.” And on the way there, we can listen to some music that’s not pop trash and is actually good; like the Beatles.
Tl;dr: There are millions of girls just like her, but, statistically speaking, you’ll never meet another girl like me.
Image via Tessa Palisoc