In honor of Election Day, here are some ads that I think indicate the Presidential candidates want you to vote… Just a reminder, you’re not allowed to read this article until you’ve voted!
- Texts
2. Emails
Kamala Harris Subject: it’s too late… we lost
IF YOU DON’T VOTE THAT IS! GO TO THE POLLS TODAY AND VOTE!
Campaign Progress Subject: We’re Abandoning Joe Biden
We’re crying so hard. Because Joe is TIED with Trump in Pennsylvania. But he needs money! And he needs you to vote! You (and your five dollars) are our only hope to win this election. If we don’t get $97,988 in two hours, we’re going to have to pack up and abandon Joe Biden. If you care AT ALL about the election, please donate just $5.
Joe Biden Subject: Donald Trump CRYING [YES!]
DESTROY TRUMP! *Election Day is Today*
*insert first, middle, and last name*: Please, I am asking one last time to donate. This election depends on you. Please. Help us get rid of this clown.
Mitch McConnell Subject: 800% Match Unlocked!
We are sobbing. Of happiness. Because first: Joe Biden thought he was leading in the polls. Then Trump SLICED right through Biden’s lead. If you are within the first 100 donators, Donald Trump will personally read your $5 donation and send you a PERSONAL thank you and an open-mouth kiss.
3. Frisky Podcast Ad
Cue smooth jazz music
Cue man’s husky voice
Everyone remembers their first time. The long build-up, the tension, the nervous energy. But for a lot of you, your first time will be this year. And people will talk about your first time [your first time specifically] forever. So say what you really want… and vote this November!
4. Commercials
Light-hearted music plays. Random people run around in a garden. A woman stops and looks at the camera.
Woman 1: Everyone knows how important this election is. It can change history! I know that I’m voting to be apart of that history! *smiles*
Another woman stops to look at the camera
Woman 2 (holding dog on a leash): I’m just going to come out and say it: I’m voting for Biden because he’s smarter, better, better looking, and just better. *dog pulls her*
White Man 1: I’m voting for Trump, because I argue with my ex wife about him all the time. Before Trump, we hadn’t spoken in years. Now, we have a reason to talk again.
Woman VO: You can make your voice heard, too! Vote now!
So if you didn’t know it was Election Day before your DMs were clogged by campaign interns– now you do.