With age, we become more comfortable with our bodies. Not just with our shapes, but with those defining, unique features about us – also known as “the weird stuff.” You grow to love that scar from the chicken pox, or the bizarre mole in the small of your back. We may get more comfortable with our bodies, but do we ever get more comfortable with people looking at them?
It’s one thing to look in the mirror and not criticize what you see, but a whole other thing to remain impervious to the gaze of others. For example, I have a growth on the back of my knee. It’s small, but decently noticeable. I’ve had it my whole life, so it doesn’t bother me. In fact, I think it’s kind of cute. Once in high school, my friend said I had a “third nipple” there, and that I should remove it. Obviously, I found that offensive, and it made me self-conscious. Another time, my sister asked if she could play with it. The latter was filled with good intent, but it still made me uncomfortable. Some body parts are private, even if they aren’t technically our “private parts.”
My friend has a particularly deep sternum. He was on the swim team in high school, and before races, all of his teammates would make eye contact with him, and rub his deep sternum like a Buddha statue. Maybe, it’s not so much about feeling violated by someone inspecting you in an insecure location, but feeling discomfort at someone inspecting you in the first place.
Personally, I’m not psyched at the concept of having every pore of my skin scrutinized by all my acquaintances. However, I am completely guilty of inspecting other people. And my mother wonders why I refuse to leave the house when I have a zit… Next time, I think I will keep my observations to myself, and let my friends exist in a world where I’m not looking at the distinctive freckle on their forehead.
P.S. No, you cannot touch my third nipple, so don’t even ask.
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