I Am The Grandma Friend
My roommate and I have a list of “Dorm Mandates” on our wall. Most of them are jokes (“Swiffer? I hardly know her!”), most of...
Posts by sarahclapp:
Seeking Fame And Fortune (But Mostly Fortune)
For the most part, I’m pragmatic. Okay, that’s a lie. I believe way too many celebrity conspiracy theories, think the show Ghost Adventures is good...
Feelin’ Groovy, Thanks To Mom
My parents were born under Eisenhower. They like to remind me that everything cost 15 cents “in their day.” They like to remind me that...
Putting the Pro in Procrastination
It’s a common affliction for the modern college student: procrastination, that self-sabotaging mind game of avoidance, excuses, and more often than not, falling into the infinite...
Ratty Romance (And Other Dining Hall Dream Dates)
I had a dream that I got hit on at the Ratty salad bar. An at-night dream, an aspirational dream, both—who’s to say? The point...
An Ode to My Middle School Alter Ego
The only large writing project I’ve ever finished was a collection of short stories I wrote in middle school. I acknowledge how tragic it is...
What’s On My Re-Vision Board?
It’s that time of year again—the time to realize that you’ve broken all of your New Years Resolutions. I was supposed to meditate every morning...
On Weddings (More Specifically, Mine)
Last weekend, I went to my cousin’s beautifully scientific wedding. To steal a line from beloved SNL figure and cultural correspondent Stefon, this wedding had...
Retro Advice for the Modern World: A Gentlewoman’s Guide
When I was growing up, I could never find relatable advice for all my daunting, coming-of-age questions—how do I talk to my crush without him...
The BAD LIST
A few weekends ago, I discovered that I am most certainly at the center of a government conspiracy. I also bought a bag of clothes...