I never thought it would be this hard. This transition from innocent youth to hardened adults, the growing distance from those I once called my closest friends, this constant barrage of knowledge I am forced to accept. Though I know more about this bleak world than my heart and mind can bear, I can’t say with confidence that I know myself anymore. Okay, since you asked, I guess if I could be any flavor, I would totally be pumpkin spice. It’s just so, like, seasonal and appropriate.
Each and every morning, it gets harder to rise from my bed. The only thing rising in times like these is the pumpkin bread I have in the oven. Actually, I think it’s almost done. Can you hold on a second while I grab that? Oh, and remind me to shut off the oven. The last thing I need is my apartment burning up in a cinnamon-infused blaze (that’s what I got the “Autumn Strolls” candle for, remember?).
But the shifting seasons bring more than changes in temperature these days. The sun no longer lingers in the summer sky, instead descending below the horizon and plunging us into the uncertain night. When it rains, it pours, and when it pours, drops of molten hot pumpkin spice latte plummet onto my fragile body. Acquaintances come and go like leaves on trees, and lovers leave with no remorse. And I think they’re only selling pumpkin spice stuff until like, Thanksgiving. Should we stock up or something? I thought fall lasted until December. I’m just not ready for all that Christmas peppermint stuff, you know?
Yet still, there remains a nagging thought I can’t drive from my mind: have I disappointed those who raised me, my gracious mother and determined father? Wisps of memory take me back to childhood, my parents sacrificing every last dream and desire to ensure my safety, my comfort, my happiness. Actually, to be fair, that barista the other day sacrificed, like, two minutes of his break to make this cute little pumpkin in my latte foam. With a cute little jack-o-lantern face and everything! Yes, as a matter of fact, I did Instagram it and it has 46 likes right now.
Soon it will be time for me to overcome these awful fears and perform what is expected of me. Or will I defy that fate which is written in the stars? Will I assume a role beyond a cog in this grand machine? Do Keurig machines have cogs? Since I just got one last week. By the way, I picked up those pumpkin spice latte cups. You just throw one in and boom, nutmeg.
Perhaps it is the finiteness of my cruel youth tossing me into the relentless beyond. Perhaps my parents planned for this all along! My humble self was taught never to doubt the authority those who raise you, but it may be time to end this unquestioning life of mine. I don’t care if blood is thicker than water. Although, now that you mention it, this pumpkin spice latte is pretty thick and frothy.
Wait, you don’t follow me on Instagram?
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