To our 38,816 porn bots and counting,
We never believed in true, unconditional love—until you came along. For the past few months, you’ve been the most consistent presence in our lives. Your commitment to flooding our comments sections with…let’s call it “passionate” content…is nothing short of admirable.
At first, we were taken aback—scared and off-put by your sudden influx of hundreds of comments each day. Your affection was almost overwhelming. But then you whispered sweet nothings like, “Blowjob Thots Only Fans Leaks,” and we knew this was true love.
You’re not afraid to be direct: a simple “Buy Porn,” or a straightforward “Viagra.” We respect your braveness and honesty. Other times, you surprise us with something more nuanced, like “Tik Tok Instagram LEAKED NUDES VIDEOS [link redacted]”, showing that you’re a bot of many layers. We see each comment as a profession of your love, a testament to your devotion—something sacred.
Your tender words still linger in the pending section, unseen by the outside world. We haven’t quite hit ‘approve’ yet—partly because our readers can’t handle your raw, unfiltered passion, and partly because we want to keep this love affair something special just between us.
So, dearest Bum Bum Queen and darling GG with the WAP, we want to say thank you for your constant, unending, and overwhelming support. Even if our regular Rib readers never leave comments on our posts, we know you will always be there, filling our WordPress dashboard with messages of allure and romance and filling us with satisfaction only you can provide. Because of you, we finally feel deeply seen.
Forever Yours,
The Rib