by CJ Risman
Looking at some of my younger cousins and their technology usage in recent weeks has given me preemptive anxiety about my future children, and how technology will affect our relationship. In turn, I wrote this letter to my future kids explaining just how easy they have it in comparison to when we 90s kids were young…
Dear Children,
I am writing you this email because I know if I were to try and explain myself in person, you’d never hear me. It seems as though if something is not read off your smartphones, you do not register it whatsoever! And that is exactly my problem. You see, back in my day, when I was your young ages of 8 and 10 years old, we worked for things, not everything was just handed to us on a digital platter…
Back in my day, if we wanted to constantly drown out the world with music, we had to play our tunes off these things called CDs! You had to manually put the disk into the player AND hit an actual button to begin playing a song. You kids have no respect for these analog processes – everything’s an “app” now and with the tap of a finger you effortlessly have all the music you could want to blast out the sound of your own mother’s voice. Not to mention the television you drown yourself in. When I was a kid your age I had to watch my television on a set, stationed in one location (often my living room). I had to use a whole separate device—something called a remote—and exert force via my finger in order to choose something to watch. Furthermore, I didn’t even have my own screen to view on, so I often had to compromise with my siblings on what to watch. And because my family didn’t have TiVo, if I missed something, I had to search the guides for a rerun schedule so I wouldn’t be behind! Because “binge watching” wasn’t a thing when I was a kid. We knew something about moderation and restraint before binge watching became a phenomenon in our young adult lives. As kids, we had to wait each week to find out what was going to happen in our shows and were restricted to watch them when they were on the television set! You two and all your friends watch so much TV, full season at a time, with no respect for the networked system like I had growing up.
And speaking of your friends… do you even know what their voices sound like?? Back in my day as a kid, if I wanted to make plans with friends, I had to call them on this thing called a “land-line phone.” It was attached to the wall and, if they wanted, my brothers could pick up the land-line phones in their rooms and listen in on my conversations! Now that built character – that and the fact that I had to memorize my friends’ phone numbers all by myself if I wanted to be in touch with them. Before I got my first palm pilot (I won’t even try and explain that one to you), I used to have to recite friends’ numbers over and over again with them during recess so I wouldn’t forget them before that evening—talk about having it rough! You two just tap numbers into your iPhones and then never even really use them. All your iMessaging, talking to ten people at once! No respect for the phone anymore.
And if it’s not your iPhone, it’s your Facebook! When I was growing up, you had to be in high school to get a Facebook account. And that’s back when it was simple, when it was actually used to talk to people. You two seem to communicate in “likes,” as if that’s really saying anything at all!
What I mean to get at here, kids, is that I wish you’d have some more respect for the technologies you’re using to interact with the world (as well as some more respect for me and what I experienced growing up)! I grew up in the good ole days, when media was abused but still recognized and worked for. Keep that in mind next time you “unfriend” me on Facebook or try to get away with Facetiming into family bonding time.
Sincerely,
Mom
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