Happy Halloween! Goblins, ghouls, graduate studies. Are you scared? Here are some safer, more palatable alternatives.
- Be The Troll Under The Bridge
You don’t need an MFA to write riddles that impede and befuddle weary travelers.
- Roam the sewers
Urban studies concentrators, this is for you. Everyone wants to move out of their hometown post-grad. This is an efficient way to explore your new city in a fun, safe, and unexpected way!
- Do acapella full-time
Stay near campus for a year, maybe two! No one can accuse you of lurking if they’re distracted by your sweet sweet tunes.
- Venture Capital
Venture into some capital.
- Do a Fulbright
Didn’t get to go abroad? Okay fine, live your European fantasy. Go get a useless MA at the University of Edinburgh. Fuck a man in a kilt, I won’t stop you.
- Write a book of poems
Because apparently anyone can just do that now.
- Create the next popular dog breed
Did you take Diversity of Life? That’s basically all the academic background you’ll need to do this. Create the next French Bulldog! Bonus points if it can’t breathe, hear, or see.
- Pursue a music career
Gigs on the Green is an adequate predictor of future industry success. Trust me.
- Crowdfund your way to space
NASA may require an advanced degree, but GoFundMe does not!
- Nude Modeling
You don’t need any skills for this, I checked.
Reject big academia. Contribute to society. You don’t need another degree.
yet