All Of Your Clothes Are Coconut Oil
Spring is right around the corner, and you know what that means — time to put away the sweaters and boots! Instead of going for sheer clothing and open-toed shoes, try covering yourself in nothing but coconut oil. Plus, it’s a perfect day to night look!
Pay Your College Loans With Coconut Oil
“Ugh, I have to find a job, a boyfriend, and pay off my college loans?” We feel your pain! You’d never expect it, but coconut oil is a great alternative to paying your debt with real money. Try unrefined coconut oil for this — when your debt collector gets a whiff of that fresh, tropical scent, they’ll never know you aren’t paying!
Instead of Tinder, Try Coconut Oil
Boring matches and pervy messages got you down? Close Tinder and swipe right on a jar of coconut oil! Trust us: Your mobile dating life will never be the same.
Coconut Oil Is Public Transportation
There’s nothing worse than that packed 9 AM commute. Next time you dread getting on a stuffy subway car, whip out your jar of coconut oil! Plus, the solid oil turns to liquid when you rub it on your hands — that’s what we call smooth travel!
Who Needs a Treadmill When You Have Coconut Oil?
All of the treadmills at your local gym occupied? The list of coconut oil’s health benefits never ends! Coconut oil makes a great substitute for your daily jog. Just slather some on your feet and let the oil get to work!
Done With Season 3 of House of Cards? Coconut Oil!
If you’re tired of Frank Underwood’s crazy Capitol antics, open up a jar of coconut oil instead! We recommend refined coconut oil for this — there’s no coconut smell, so you’ll never know you’re not watching Netflix!
Coconut Oil Will Be Your 11th Instagram Like
Sometimes, the only pick-me-up you need is that 11th like on the underexposed photo of avocado toast you posted on Instagram this morning. Luckily, coconut oil will always be there to communicate your social media value to your loyal followers!
Switch Out a Twenty-Something Trying to Make It In The Big City with Coconut Oil
Way too many aspiring millennials in a metropolitan area for your comfort? Thank heavens for coconut oil! Instead of bringing your friends to that gin distillery in Williamsburg you saw on Yelp, bring a jar of coconut oil instead!
Coconut Oil Can Be Your Parents
We get it — dealing with parents can be sooooo difficult. Lucky for you, when mom and dad are nagging, coconut oil is a perfect substitute! No one will be able to tell the difference. And remember: unrefined coconut oil will give them that coconutty parental scent!
Substitute Your Dissatisfaction With Life With Coconut Oil
Little known fact: coconut oil is the perfect replacement for everything going wrong in your meaningless life! Once you try it, you’ll never know how you lived without it.
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